You don’t recover quickly from something like this, and there is no part of me that wants to. I sat in my office where I sit every night to talk to God, and pray protection over us while we sleep, but this time I was speechless. I collapsed on to the couch with a tear rolling down my cheek in absolute astonishment at the beautiful thing that had just unfolded in our home.
Never let anyone tell you God isn’t concerned with the healing of our hearts at the deepest and most personal level. Now, it’s important to know that Becky (my wife) grew up with no father in her life, and only recently have we discovered how desperately we have needed and longed for one. “Father Me/Us” is probably the prayer I say most often.
I can’t imagine words that will adequately capture the epic beauty of this story and I don’t know if they even exist, but I’ll do my best:
I got off work and went to the store to pick a few things up. I had just returned from a 4-day trip to Colorado to work at a men’s retreat and thought it might be nice to get Becky a card to let her know how much I appreciate her. There were two I liked and couldn’t make up my mind so I got both. When Becky got home I gave her one of the cards and she was very grateful; a nice moment I thanked God for. I thought that was the end of it. I figured I would leave the other card out for her in the morning, which I did.
We ate supper and watched a movie; Becky went to the dining room to work on a puzzle she had begun while I was out of town while I stayed there watching TV. I began to look at my Amazon music app to see if they added any new music. I found a song I wanted by Van Morrison called “Into The Mystic.” I remembered the first time I heard it; it was on a 1989 movie called “Dream a Little Dream.” I remember it being really good, and thought Becky and I had listened to it before too, so I downloaded it. I tapped it to start it playing on my phone. After just a few seconds of this beautiful tune I was moved by a strong urge to dance with my wife. I have only danced 4 times in the last 25 years and they have all been at weddings, including mine, so this was a very new ‘urge’ for me. It felt a little risky, and I didn’t know how she would react.
I turned off the TV and plugged my phone into the stereo, or tried to any way. The plug wasn’t working well with my phone case; the music wouldn’t play and the speakers were making loud popping sounds. I started to scrap the whole idea, but I heard “No, stick with this.” Becky told me later that she was about to ask what the heck I was doing that was making all the popping noise, but she heard “Be still,” and didn’t say anything. I took the case off of my phone, plugged it in, and cranked up the song.
I walked into the dining room and hugged her from behind. She got out of her chair and I held her hand while she twirled around and we went back into the living room and began to dance. She looked up at me and I have never seen so deeply into her eyes. She was crying and said ” this is the most romantic thing you have ever done.” She buried her head back into my chest and I just smiled and said thank-you God. I must confess my first thought was “Jesus – you’re the best wing man ever!” But Becky’s reaction was so overwhelming that I sensed it was something much deeper–like maybe God was pursuing her through me. This dance turned into the most beautiful thing I think Id ever been a part of.
When the song was over, another came on, it was a Need To Breath song called “Multiplied” and this was the opening verse:
“Your love is like radiant diamonds
Bursting inside us we cannot contain
Your love will surely come find us
Like blazing wild fires singing Your name”
I don’t think we were even still dancing at this point, we were in such an embrace I honestly couldn’t tell where I ended and she began. I have never felt so close to her. It felt surreal, otherworldly, mystic, even Holy. When the song was over, Becky was still smiling and crying and I felt a little dazed, like I was dreaming. We hugged one more time, said I love you and again I looked in her eyes and saw a part of her I had never seen–a stunning part I will never forget.
I wondered into my office to pray before bed, but couldn’t muster any words. I recognized it was God who orchestrated this unforgettable event, but I was about to learn that something even deeper had just happened for Becky.
This was much bigger than just God bringing romance into our marriage; it was The Father relentlessly pursuing the heart of his daughter, you see, because when I walked out of my office she met me in the hallway still teary-eyed she said to me “I know this may sound strange, and I know you’re my husband, but…I feel like God just gave me my first Father-Daughter dance.”
Again – I couldn’t speak.